** Hell of a Life

We've created this area in the hope of seeing material ranging from some well-told (or well retold) jokes to original writing with a humorous slant, or anything else that might appeal to the kind of person who enjoys playing with words more than people. That probably means someone like yourself. N.B. -- Postings preceded by ** contain some sexual or risqué content. (Makes them easier to find.)
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** Hell of a Life

Post by Bobinwales » Tue Nov 15, 2005 12:44 pm

It is several years in the future, and George W Bush has a heart attack and dies. Unsurprisingly, he finds himself outside the gates of hell where the devil himself is waiting for him.

"I don't know what to do here,” says the devil. "You are on my list but I have no room for you, I’m absolutely full up, but you definitely have to stay here. I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I have three people here who weren't quite as bad as you were. I'll let one of them go, and you can to take their place. And just to prove that I’m not as horrible as people make out I'll even let YOU decide who leaves."

George thought that sounded pretty reasonable, so he agreed.

The devil opened the door to a room. And in it was Richard Nixon and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty-handed over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell.

"No!" George said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer, and I don’t like water. I only ever crossed it when I had to the whole time I was President, I don't think I could do that all day long."

So the devil led him to the next room in this one was Tony Blair with a sledgehammer and a huge pile of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time.

"No, I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day!" commented George.

The devil opened a third door.

In it, George saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in spread eagle pose, with a look of boredom on his face. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she always did best.

George Bush looked at this in disbelief for a while and finally said, "Yeah, I can handle this."

The devil smiled and said...

"OK, Monica, you can go, I’ll let Saint Peter know you are on your way!"
Signature: All those years gone to waist!
Bob in Wales

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